- Start rubbing your nipples and if someone looks at you, pull your fingers up and taste them.
- Go to a restaurant & order your meal. Eat it absolutely normally. Then order dessert. As you eat it, start to yell and cry. Throw your head back and sob. Shuffle to the register and pay for your meal. Then act completely normal and leave a tip.
- Purposefully swipe to something sensitive when someone is seeing something in your phone.
- Blurt out ‘awkward silence’.
Like no Susan, we were actually contributing to society but you had to fuck it up. Well, now you have everyone’s attention. Your move, dumbass. - Make repeated eye contact with someone but hold each glance just a second too long so they’re sure you’re a weirdo.
- Fart loudly and smile at people around you.
- Laugh when the appropriate response wasn’t to laugh.
- “My aunt died”
hysterical laughter
- “My aunt died”
- If you’re a guy, say, “anybody else hard?” Works best at funerals.
- Stare at your phone and sigh, saying, “Stop sending me nudes, dad”.
- Or just be yourself, you awkwardo. (Or at least, that’s what I tell myself. Works every time.)
What is the fastest way to make someone uncomfortable?
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